Friday ~ Day 25

Hello Everyone ~
So, it's Friday, I had an awesome day at the beach with some of my family yesterday.  My niece was in town from Chicago, with her husband and two boys I love.  They came to the beach, along with my brother, his wife, and their other daughter, along with her fiance and two boys as well.  It was such an awesome day at the beach, I always love seeing my family, any of them.  But, don't enjoy them anymore if they throw me digs, which I won't allow myself to do any longer because I am on a self love, follow your bliss journey, and there is no room for negative anyone, family included.  I no longer feel bad, but actually relieved because I was in denial about my family, thinking they are "so great, so supportive and so loving and giving", but the truth is, they are not.  Oh well, it's okay, I will always love them, and if our paths cross again, I will be there with open arms.  The cool thing is I know this is "magically" happening, because the Universe knows my energy shifted, and I am no longer a match to that abuse.  Yay for me!  So empowering to me, and the best thing is, I only have love and peace for them.  There is a saying, "May all beings, animals, trees, etc., be free of suffering".  I love it.  
I also sat down and watched some of Teal and Sarbdeep's Podcast #20 yesterday, and it was all about finding your "core imprint", and finding you life purpose with that information.  I only watched part of it, but it went along with her "Ask Teal" video from Saturday, and her blog this week.  It's cool how there is always a theme, one that we all seem to be going through at this time.  As I went back to my birth, wow, I had a lot of visions of not feeling wanted, not feeling loved.  I cried a lot of tears over this last night. 
I watched the rest of it today, and cried, not feeling very loved and happy today.  My feelings go toward my ex missing him, feeling so disconnected, but then try to go back to childhood.  How interesting this is becoming to automatically be able to do this now and be aware of it.  Today those memories brought feelings to me of being disconnected, disconnected from my source of energy, my mother.  Like I was ripped from her womb too early, I was screaming, crying in desperation!  Not wanting to leave, not wanting to go.  This is that same feeling I have felt many times without my ex, feeling such a disconnection of energy, of source.  It is actually a terrible feeling, one I hope will integrate soon.  The same visions, and sadness and pain came over me all day today, along with feeling alone missing my ex and wishing he was here with me.  I am sad, I am sorry, I am free.  Free to be able to feel how I feel, whatever it may be.  But, to be loving and soft with myself, and know things reveal themselves to you when they should, the Universe knows what is best for us, for you, for me.  So awesome to remember this, and know this, and live by this.  And allow life to unfold, on it's own time, in it's own way, but just relaxing back and flowing with the river, not against it as before.  
Namaste ~